One Last Goodbye, 2020

Ops, December is almost ending.

And nope, no Christmas, no celebration.

Here goes another year, the one and only 2020, my last twenties.

What I appreciate this year:

• Being healthy and well-fed with food,
• Still working and making a living.
• A chance to try out working from home. And a second chance as well.
• Get to meet most of my favourite people still and they are healthy too!
• Get the funeral of grandma done before lockdown.
• Unlock new skills as I have more time this year, like upcycling.
• Annual leaves that I feel like applying whenever I want.
• Setting up my new place slowly and get pre-loved items once awhile.
• Finally understand the gist of herbs, especially basil, smell so good and I made my first pesto sauce.
• Found a new interest: Food Lab Experiments. Though I failed a lot of times.
• Living a totally different lifestyle with new norms, pretty cool and challenging at the same time.
• Meatless ever since grandma passed away in Jan.
• Attack on Titan Finale is showing this Dec! OMG, THIS IS INSANE~~~
• And new songs from JJ, CNBlue and Ed Sheeran before 2020 ends!

Nonetheless, 2020 is not too bad if we look at the good sides.

Not everything is bad, or not?

As there is always a first time for whatever we do as long we are living. 

2020 is a good year for "first time" for the human being.

First time being threatened as a species, regardless of your status or races.

First time our country is fooled by politicians as a whole, it sucks.

First time getting nation lockdown and just stay home.

First time we learn to appreciate gathering time and freedom.

First time we treat every goodbye as one last goodbye, perhaps?

First time we do not have to attend weddingsss?

First time for us to rethink of our incomes and other oportunities.

First time no graduation for students.

And a lot more...

But seriously....

I miss travelling and meeting my friends with no concerns.

I miss flying in the sky and enjoy my flight's meal.

I miss my little nephew who is growing up so fast in Singapore.

I miss the world and sincerely pray for the best for 2021.

Hey 2020, you give us so much and we lose so much at the same time.

No matter what happens, it is time for the human to rethink what we've done.

Intelligence is not everything, but being wise and thoughtful will sustain our humanity.

Instead of being scared or careless, we really need to take Covid-19 as the greatest lesson in human history. 

It is definitely a jackpot if you make it till the end to regain your freedom.

If you don't, pray for the rest of the world ok?

Last but not least, some photos to sum up my little 2020:

Aunty Nico's legs are getting weak now.

Unable to walk much, sorry babe.

While me and 2020, trying to get some abs but well...

Maybe 2021 la.

One and only nice photo for this year, I think.

Representing my last twenties.

So goodbye, dearest 2020.

You stay safe and take care my friends.

Stay alive so that I can see you again!

空·虚·无

 2020年毕竟还是一个让人摸不着头脑的一年。

说它是一个劫，它却给了我们很多的新体验。

但总的来说，它是空、虚、无的一年，绝对没错。

可能是我自己的处理方式让我有这样的想法。

但空虚这个感觉却是源源不绝的，所以只好想尽办法去填补那样的空虚感。

因为想做的事很多，但惰性作祟，

天使与恶魔的僵持，让我时常责备自己，真的没出息啊。

除了看很多不同的动漫，多到我也数不清了，

前一阵子也一口气追完11季的美剧《Modern Family》，对它真的是又爱又恨。

看到第9季的时候，心里的感觉就是：

“糟了，又要看完了，空虚又要来了”。

不过话说，整200多集的美剧，真心觉得好看。

无厘头的剧情还是有的，不过感概的复杂心情也一直环绕着。

这部美剧从2009年开始播放，2020年4月才圆满完结。

剧中小孩子的角色从小学演到了大学，看着他们每一季不断地成长，能不感触吗？

一个大家庭，内有三个小家庭，每集上演着不一样的生活剧情。

有同志，有年龄差距的跨国再婚，还有普通的小康之家。

这部剧覆盖的层次也太广大了，有些剧情也很狗血，还会赚人泪水。

不过，欢笑的时候还是比较多啦，反正就是一部快乐的美剧，大力推荐。

第一季的样子，大概是这样吧~

也是问题很多的家庭，可是谁家没问题呢？

后来的他们~

想象从2009年开始追剧的剧迷如何耐心等待，

而我则是一次性看完他们的成长。

幸好我不用一季一季慢慢等，真的会抓狂呢~

反正，也看完了，这剧很合我胃口，难得。

追完后，真的是空啊~

再早期，追了一部网络小说……

《冥君幽情》

看题目就知道，这不是一个正常的故事。

有一点爱情，占10%，其余90%都是讲诉灵异，鬼怪尸妖等。

简单来说，女主角被冥王选中进行冥婚，

然后人鬼恋，还有很多很多的抓鬼环节，

还有还有男主冥王，也就是阎罗王，或鬼王，

一定要很帅很有灵气，然后很霸道，等等~

反正，正常人的小说我看到闷了，就选择异常一些的来看。

然后，我就回不去了。

投入在那样的灵异世界，看完整部后回到现实，

又是一场空的感觉啊~

作者真强，这样也能写得出来，佩服！

然后再次追的下一部小说，当然也回不去正常版的故事了。

《我的傲娇鬼夫》

鬼夫耐地狱鬼将，不能再看冥王当男主的故事了，

因为没有人写得比《冥君幽情》好，至少我这么觉得。

然后剧情还可以，因为有神秘感，

加上可以自己去想象，然后投入在另一个世界里，心灵满满的。

只是当然，看完后又是空虚感，有点难受。

追网路小说不好的就是，眼睛很累，

让我觉得我的闪光越来越严重了。

就这样，一下空虚，一下期待，

又空又虚，折磨啊~

不过，总好过没期待，那才是日常的折磨~

比如，一整年辛苦工作，然后没有旅行的期待，

日子重复循环，没有什么大目标，

除了存钱，然后安慰自己过后要好好玩一遍~

你想去哪儿呢？

我想去哪儿？我也不知道也~

真的不知道要去哪儿，心也很累了。

2020年就是这样，来来回回。

努力解锁未知的潜能，

尽情享受居家办公的小日子，

感恩能够和家人在一起，

虽然哪儿也不能去，

想见的人也见不了。

就让多出来的时间变得更有价值一些吧！

说一说我的偶像林俊杰和CN Blue吧！

他们出新歌曲了！

喜欢JJ的《最向往的地方》，《幸存者》，还有《Stay with You》。

喜欢CN Blue的《Then, now and forever》，《Would you marry me》，

还有红薯夫妇的《Banmal Song》。

主唱容和真的很帅，对他就说不出的喜欢，想要一辈子跟他的那种喜欢。

他的调皮，才华，柔情还有细腻，就是他了！

31岁的男人，真的魅力无限，越来越稳重，让人没办法不喜欢。

重新拿起吉他，也是因为他。

虽然我还是那么没出息，依然学不会。

不过最近的循环播放都少不了这几首，

好像其他歌曲都不入耳，听不了。

心境的差异，靠歌曲来支配。

因为音乐有治愈心灵的功效，听一首好歌很重要。

再不然，就努力看食谱，想烘什么蛋糕就立马去动手。

好奇感是其次，主要还是害怕自己浪费了2020，

什么都没做就虚度了光阴。

能够通过烘培来打发时间，其实是意外，不甘愿失败，

所以就一直尝试，也让我有了一个目标，

顺便完成自己未完成的to-do list项目。

说来也复杂，反正烘培就让我保持有动力，

还想试很多不同的食谱，且让2020年成为香喷喷的一年吧！

夜晚睡不着的时候，就刷一刷购物网，

止一止购物的欲望。

其实欲望早已被荷包限制了，然后努力修行断舍离，

很多东西看了都能够三思而买，

有些甚至看都不看了。

遏制购物欲的最高境界，我快到了。

重点是，我什么也不需要啦，

不重要的东西买来干啥？

衣服穿不完，新年大概也不过了，

所以没什么需要买的，罢了。

只是，收到包裹的喜悦，目前还在努力遏制。

网购啊，烦不烦，真实的~

随机播放，听一首《飞鸟和蝉》，心情很容易就到了谷底。

毕竟了解了歌曲的意境，真的很难不悲伤，或许这就是我们的结局。

第五个季节，第十三个月，

我们再见吧。

其实也没什么，可能放空的时间多了，思绪做怪了。

一旦有机会闲空，很多奇奇怪怪的想法与空虚感就会来袭，真的受不了。

所以努力让自己忙碌，不能够太空闲，不然会承受不了空虚的感觉。

宁可劳碌，也不愿又空又虚。

我就是这样的劳碌命，

但劳碌了，荷包也没什么增长，哈哈~

希望2020的最后一个月，

心情能够保持愉快，

因为没有成就感的感觉，会要了我的命。

对自己太苛刻了，真的是另类折磨。

说白了，就是不希望虚度此生，

如此简单。

祝福你，安好。

How are you, 2020?

Hey, how are you so far?

Is 2020 getting any better?

Hmm....

 

At least Aunty Nico gets better now, no more suffering.

Looking good huh?

So glad that she stays.

And still cute as usual.

2020 is definitely better with her around. 

As this year, meeting people is a tough thing to do.

So cherish whenever we can meet our close and dearest friends and family.

It is good to know that everyone you know is ok.

Though grandma is no longer with us,

but she is always in our hearts.

And yea, helping cousin in her business marketing and design.

I really enjoyed myself doing stuff like that. 

Designing is my thing.

And then meeting friends is also quite challenging nowadays.

Especially when they have children and married.

Their focus is just no longer on friends.

Which is normal, I think.

Some fun moments with little friends.

Appreciate if your friends make time to go see you.

And go visit them once a while too.

Should work both ways.

Little friends~

Let's grow healthier and stronger together k~

Because.....

health is so damn important....

And it hurts still.....

19th October....

we lost a good friend.

Due to bacteria/virus infection.

Dearest Pink, 

you will be missed for sure.

VOV will never be complete again...

Our first concert in USM Jazz Band....

Our first song is called "September"...

Rest in peace, my dear friend.

Yeap, life is fragile, 

you don't know death or tomorrow will come faster.

But life goes on and on...

Some working moments in 2020:

Held a press conference, phew everything was ok.

Press interview and we were included in the photo,

ops!

Trying to look inoccent huh?

And the beach clean up!

Someone told me it is too late to save the world,

no point to do all these works, so why so serious?

But hey!

The world sucks because of your existence.

You are truly the shame for human being,

just do your part k?

And 10.10.2020~

A perfect day for you?

I think it was quite a memorable day for me, haha!

One day stidy trip that considered fun during such a Covid season.

It was good to be able to go around for new sights.

Team that is my favourite for now.

Other than that, some me time and self-development experience:

 

Baking skill unlocked and still experimenting,

no oven but you find ways~

I think it is a fun and healing thing to do so far.

Keep my curious and focus.

Of course more cakes to eat after bake.

 

And online shopping for stuffs~

Just the feeling of receiving parcels and unboxing~

Really obsessed, but still under control.

Last but not least, my big project all these while:

Wuhoo, 2020 and my little achievements.

I don't like to waste time, and I need to have accomplishment. 

Though these are not making money,

but the satisfaction is there.

Success cannot be measured with money.

It is a  happy feeling within you,

when you hit the goal with a greater reason behind,

not only for yourself but also for the community.

And enjoy what you are doing, 

when you do the right thing right.

About July and August 2020

 Summer days are good.

After what happened last month,

I think September is going to be alright.

Hey Aunty Nico, please stay alright okay?

She had bad days.

 

Tracheal Collapse happen to small breed dogs,

especially those with short necks.

Like Nico.

It was pretty scary, we thought we were going to lose her anytime.

 

Brought her to the vet a few times for checkup and arranging for operation.

Not an easy moment for us.

I guess we just want her to enjoy her final years with us healthily and happily.

I hope this one year that she was with us is good so far.

So basically tracheal collapse is causing breathing difficulties, 

suffocating and gasing for air due to a narrow and flatten trachea.

I swear it was one of the most scariest moments for me,

I ddin't know what to do to help her.

Sleepless nights for all of us.

So she used her mouth to breath most of the time.

And medication is a must.

Poor Nico, no mood for anything.

She didn't know what happen to herself, 

Well she is old, more issues discovered after checking with the doctor.

So operation was postponed to fix her other issues first.

 

Trying to lift up her head for more airways.

And she knew it was for her own good.

Gave her my pillow as well.

At last, medication and side effects.

Vomit and not eating, that was another tough time.

But we are glad that her breathing issue gets better after awhile.

So doctor said she will be alright for now, until the tracheal collapse gets worse again.

It is still collapsing, but at least she can breathe smoothly for now.

Throwback the day before all these happen.

Now we removed her collar and give her more freedom.
So have to enjoy every day when she is with us.
It is a gift.

Back then, life still sucks in 2020.
Covid-19 doesn't disappear.
But we are all back in full operation in September.
No more working from home.

So I explore my talent in food experimenting. ma

 

Made sushi with avocado, 

and also my favourite so far:

Carrot cake and banana cake!

I love cake without mixer, so easy, haha!

And yea, more snake issues happen nowadays.

I don't like it at all.

 

This is a huge python!

Real shit happen.

Of course I know human can be one of the reasons why it is out here.

They are just looking for food,

and lots of trash around so there are a lot of rats.

But this is too much for us,

and it was less than 50m from my house.

Wanted to catch it, but the bomba was too slow.

So many times this happen, 

I think the python family is growing larger nowadays.

Right behind my house.

Okay, good bye snakes.

Please go away.

As a conclusion,

September please treat me better.

I pray for Nico, and the world to get well soon.

2020年的夏

就这样，2020年的上半年结束了！

话说，我也越来越懒惰记录生活了~

先来几张可爱的宝贝照吧~

妮可阿姨的黄色雨衣~

爱搞怪~

直接出卖它的丑样~ 

你以为它介意吗？

然后小伙子的卖萌照是百看不厌的啦~ 

 

送他的长裤子据说已经不能穿了，只好充当摩登帽子呗！

然后吃饭也越来越厉害咯，吃相百般，哈哈！

最可爱的是他很会笑，爱摆pose~ 

这个叫阿姨我如何抵挡呢？！

小叮当弟弟~

 

小老板的拽拽样子，瞬间变脸小可爱！

真的很想飞过去找他玩呢，真可惜~

别人家的孩子都很好玩篇： 

某天，当了半日保姆去了，科科~

别人家的孩子都比较好玩啦，因为不用24小时照料~

玩得开心就送回去咯~ 

 

一点宝贝你好，请多多指教~

 

看他爱狗又害怕的样子真可爱~

要他乖乖坐下来也真难，只好让他随意咯。

小小神兽，精力很充沛，一个上午罢了我就累坏了~

哈哈！

废物利用兼手作篇：

实在不能接受垃圾越来越多的事实，

但是未来应该会继续恶化，在地球毁灭以前，

我想尽我的本能，让这些资源不变成垃圾。

不能回收的带铝塑料包装，是日常的一部分。

它即不能回收，而且还会污染环境，真的很悲哀。

不过幸好它还有一点点功能，只要花一些时间。

全新的使命！

虽然不知道我能够坚持多久，但是我会用我的能力，

让更多人看到他们对地球造成的破坏。

垃圾能够再使用就是资源，

很开心我终于掌握了制作这个篮子的技巧，

而且越做越快呢！

厨艺实验篇：

相信大家这些日子都有在厨房大展厨艺，我也是的。

除了之前的蛋糕失败，还有几项甜点也是白做的了。

这次就做能吃的，不要再失败了~

日式料理！

寿司虽然丑，可是很好吃~

真没想到原来这么难包成扎实的条状，有挑战哦！

韩式料理！拌饭！ 

刚好妈妈买了新玩具——碗盏，很特别，适合用一用~

所以就七手八脚的乱搞一通，

卖相是不错的，可是太辣了！

辣死我妈~

有花收篇： 

突然，就有花收了~

虽然觉得有点破费了，可是也很意外的啦。

谢谢你的花，

可是我比较喜欢有钱花，你懂吗？

破财消灾篇： 

 

话说，这是我俩的劫数，突然就被野猫袭击了！

我们都有错，故事就不说了。

刚从诊所回来的迷蒙样，因为打麻醉针，伤口也缝了几针。

真的是赔了夫人又折兵，

血流过了，痛却不放过我们~

更重要的是，荷包很痛呢！

宠物医疗费竟比人类还贵8倍！！！

我这些伤痕还算什么？

虽然疯猫子又是抓又是咬的，

虽然我的双腿毁容了，留疤了~

我这个月的额外开销，真的是让我心更痛啊~

破财消灾，该死的还要打针，不爽~

幸好，现在都过去了，

不过妮可阿姨好像忘了这件事，又开始要追猫子去了~

终于能够见面篇： 

3个月没有聚餐的日子，终究还是过去了。

见到友人，是开心的。

小学同学小聚会~

前同事的见面，因为发生大事件了~ 

如今，全员功成身退，

杂志社也只能是回忆了。

感恩当时遇见这些人，而且大家都互相联络。

大哥就是我们的大佬，

希望未来还可以像这样见见面，嘘寒问暖也无所谓。

吃蛋糕的季节篇： 

 

耶，又是吃蛋糕的时候！

生日双星，怎么小的好像比较兴奋呢？

哈哈！

生日快乐，我们的杨心妈妈！

父亲节也是吃蛋糕的日子哦~ 

 

我们也是很久没这样多人聚会了啊~

阿公，父亲节快乐!

简单的庆祝会，最后变成甜点会了，科科！

爱吃甜甜的~

俩老多日没出去见人了~

虽然未人齐，可是也是很开心的啦！

然后是7月宝宝的大日子！

而她最爱的还是Kim Gary，死心塌地那种~ 

 

n年前的西瓜，现在竟然还有，哈哈！

我喜欢！

一点的妈妈，生日快乐哦！

 

这也是我多日以后再次踏入葛尼商场，小兴奋，逛了好久~

希望你愿望成真，新居美满顺利。

全体的最后一个20年华，满满感触啊~

还是想和你们一起继续成长吧！

公私不分明篇： 

这是久违的海边野餐记吗？

是的！太久太久没有去野餐了，

真的是爽啊~

话说，这是非法聚会。

所以话不多说。

因为在办公室，social distancing这件事还是要遵守的。

不过很快，轮流居家上班这件事就要结束了，

有点不舍呢！

 

然后……是不是该剪头发了呢？

7月的疯狂事： 

都是Go Shop惹的祸。

老妈子，居家也能网购，

服了。

最后，让妮可阿姨告诉你： 

2020的夏天依然是美好的。

有工作，是幸福的。

祝福你：笑口常开，身体健康！！！